Color My World

COLOR MY WORLD
The choice to serve God was made at a young age. I chose to walk in the path of

the Lord regardless of what would come my way. I admit there were times when the

curiosity of what was in the world was something that would try to draw me to change

my lifestyle.

I was 43 when a special confidence was made real to me. I knew

beyond any shadow of any doubt I was who I was supposed to be and doing what I

was supposed to be doing. I had walked with the Lord for thirty-three years.

Choices and decisions have always been difficult for me. I asked God to help me

understand why I struggled with this area of life. He took me back to my childhood.

I was a curious child. I can remember my relatives telling my Mom it was cute to

see such an inquisitive child. “She doesn’t miss a thing,” would be my Mother’s reply.

School brought a new environment and a place to understand there was a different

world outside of the small river town my family called home.

Art class brought a challenge for this student who was artistically challenged. I

had always “colored” my picture the way I thought it should be. I took it to my Mom, she

would grin and say, “That looks wonderful, Donna.”

But my “scribbling” with the crayons didn’t bring the same words of acceptance

from the teacher. “You need to stay within the lines.” I can still hear those words in my

mind today. I began to watch the other students color and I compared my picture to

theirs.

I was taken back and astonished. I could see how they were coloring their

pictures. Then I understood what the teacher meant. But, I had another dilemma. I didn’t

know what colors to choose.
Some things were easy—the sky should be blue, the grass green, and the sun

yellow. But how about the flowers? Should I go the conventional route and use the

primary colors, or should I look into my box of different colors and give the flowers a

new dimension of expression.

I began to watch the other students and their choice of colors. I could then

determine if I like the outcome of their decision. That way I knew what color to use for

my picture. This way of making decisions worked wonderful for art class, but I found

myself doing the same thing outside of the world of crayons, scissors, paper, and glue.

As I grew older choices and decisions were still a struggle. I again found myself

listening and watching others who had made choices. I tried to learn from their mistakes.

I was always afraid of making the wrong choice.

My dream was to live life as a Christian young lady. I was going to be the one

who everyone would look at and say, “She is a perfect example of what a Christian

should be.” The problem with that is I looked to others for complete and total acceptance

instead of accepting myself and the way God had made me.

My dream has changed. Now I look at each day as a way for God to let me

know him in a different way. I strive to be the best I can be everyday. I give of myself

100 per cent everyday. Although, there are days when my 100 per cent is more on one day than

it is on other days.

And I keep striving to dream. I wanted to see my written work published. This has

happened several times. Next, I want to see a collection of my written work have a

book. Will I ever have a best seller? Only God knows. If that is in his plans for me then

I’m willing to accept that. But, at the same time, my words can be written and meant

to be read by a few.

I do not want to stand in front of God at my judgment and hear that my work was

idle words.